Oscar Wilde - Women are to be loved...

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JAY 3:44 AM  3 comments

The 7 Cardinal Sins minus 1

This creation leaves the trivial things in life like the general elections and an underperforming economy to the lesser mortals and talks about real pressing issues faced by the mankind and that is courting girls to find a suitable match for Jay.

Acknowledgement
This piece is being presented with a fair knowledge that tomorrow a disgruntled employee, a spurned lover, the newspaper-wala whose monthly bill I didn't pay and the neighbor whose window panes I had broken while playing cricket 20 years ago, can use it against me. But I see the Glass - Half Full. So, I confess here with a hope for humanity and its tendency to forgive those who err.

Cover Story

01/09/13 4:11:44 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: Hi

01/09/13 4:12:00 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Hi

01/09/13 4:17:51 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: howz u

01/09/13 4:18:13 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Cool.. u?

01/09/13 4:25:50 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: gud

01/09/13 4:26:41 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: n work??

01/09/13 4:27:07 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Wo bhi theek hai .. How was yo trip to Singapore?

01/09/13 4:32:44 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: awesome...

01/09/13 4:44:11 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: how was ur date....?

01/09/13 4:47:27 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Was gr8 ..

01/09/13 4:47:54 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: dis was which 1 ....ur nth..

01/09/13 4:48:50 PM: Jay The Old Hag: 6th .. It took me sm effort dis time but I managed ..

01/09/13 4:49:01 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: haha

01/09/13 4:49:03 PM: Xena The Warrior Princes: omg.. 6th in a row

01/09/13 4:49:16 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: did she like u ? dats imp..

01/09/13 4:50:20 PM: Jay The Old Hag: I think she wanted to say so .. Her lips moved but her voice was nt audible ..

01/09/13 4:50:31 PM: Jay The Old Hag: And ..

01/09/13 4:50:30 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: hahaa

01/09/13 4:50:33 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: omg

01/09/13 4:50:59 PM: Jay The Old Hag: After u poison some1 it's best not to hang around fr long..

01/09/13 4:50:59 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: frm whr on dis earth did you hunt her

01/09/13 4:51:35 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: it depends on wat type of  poison....u r inducin

01/09/13 4:51:38 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: n on whom

01/09/13 4:53:18 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Oh! Don worry I know a bit bout poisons now after d exp of administering it 6 times..

01/09/13 4:53:41 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: haha

01/09/13 4:53:52 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: dat i knw how smart u r in administerin poison

01/09/13 4:55:24 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: after all a 33 yr old guy will b an expert in it

01/09/13 4:56:36 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Is it so .. ? But all good things come to an end :( ... N now I hv only 1 to go ..

01/09/13 4:58:42 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: freak...r u havin a swamybhar

01/09/13 5:01:19 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Did u mean to type Swamy Bar .. ? Tht will b nice ..

01/09/13 5:01:36 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: haha.. dat too wit ladies dancin

01/09/13 5:02:18 PM: Jay The Old Hag: If they are dancing there, they may not be "ladies".... :p.. I mean to stop at 7 .. Coz I hv heard its 7 Khoon maaf..

01/09/13 5:02:44 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: after dat u will b hanged ???  or ...

01/09/13 5:04:31 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Pata nahin .. may be. Also, aftr tht I hv no reason to kill ..

01/09/13 5:04:48 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Der r only 7 Cardinal sins na ..

01/09/13 5:05:07 PM: Jay The Old Hag:  So, may b they will hang me aftr tht ..

01/09/13 5:08:31 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: haha

01/09/13 5:08:42 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: yaar set ho ja.... bahut tp kar liya life main

01/09/13 5:10:12 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: official life set hai...ab personal kar le

01/09/13 5:11:07 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: i will meet u for a round of chit chat

01/09/13 5:12:13 PM: Jay The Old Hag: Life insurance hai na ..

01/09/13 5:13:57 PM: Xena The Warrior Princess: haha

Epilogue:

Dating Wrath, Greed, Gluttony, Pride, Envy, Lust and Sloth.

1. Wrath (Ira) - She was all wrapped in a blood red sleeveless gown. Our love met a pitifully tragic end in the very first time we went out on a dinner date. Over dinner, we waited and weren't served for almost 20 minutes, Ira's anger boiled over. Firstly, she abused the manager long enough for him to have nightmares and then, she mocked me endlessly for being the spineless person I am. I think she may have questioned my manhood too. To marry her or not, was not the Q but survival of The Bengali Bhadralok was!!! It was not the poison that I used but Ira was done by her anger.

2. Gluttony (Gulabo) – Not every woman biting that Mango is as enticing as Katrina Kaif (see here) even if her name is Gulabo. Some of them stuff themselves like a pig. I am a pig myself but I keep my gastronomic adventures to myself and my ways don't infringe someone else's peace. Gulabo, however, crossed all limits. When I thought the dinner was over, she ordered an extra soup and then, ate my ice cream too. It was the chocolate sauce I added on top of the ice-cream bowl, which was poisoned. I have never seen anyone lick one's death to such delight. Charles Schultz has once said, “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.” I guess he was wrong.

3. Greed (Avaritia) - To call Avaritia just another girl would be grossly undermining her persona. I find one word that can capture enormity of her acumen - A Female Munimji. When the food bill was produced she asked for a 5 % discount because the tamarind was too tangy and another 5% because the Rasogolla was too sweet. The effort required to burn that extra calorie would mean an extra month on the treadmill in the Gym. So, someone needed to pay the fee. Avaritia's argument was just and so was mine (to kill her). Ten more customers in a day like that would result in the failure of entire food and restaurant business. I was dutifully bound to carry out God's work and save the industry.

4. & 5. Pride and Envy (SuperVidia) – SuperVidia was elegant and calm. In the conversation, she flew like a cherepy bird from one topic to another describing how awesome she is. I soaked everything with her effervescent beauty till we started talking about our parents. She said her dad is humble, caring, rich, intelligent, USAIN BOLT, STEVE JOBS, BABA RAMDEV, ... (ok! she may not have said the last few but you get the drift..). By the time, Supervidia finished, I started to believe her Dad didn't require a woman as a partner to give birth to her. He is superhuman enough to have done it on his own (you know Mitosis). To be the daughter of someone so prolific was shining through Supervidia's face. Little else in the surrounding mattered to her.
            Neighbours envy is your pride. By that corollary, the one beaming with pride is unknowingly causing envy somewhere else. So, the above lady who had pride on her nose, in her silky smooth hair, her billowing gown, her apple red cheeks - was guilty of causing envy too. Unwillingly, I killed her twice. Once, with the poison and then, I shot her too.

6. Now, I imagine you must be waiting for the one I killed because of her lecherous nature .. for her lust..

Actually, I killed her because she said her name was Sunny Leone. Just like that or may be because I was bored of excessive social media jokes on her.

[About Sunny Leone - Did you guys watch The Virginity Hit, the movie that introduced me to Sunny Leone. If not for anything else, it is better than spending time in such blogs :P. The movie opens with the following epic lines  -

“I'm gonna do to your virginity what Alfred Hitchcock did to birds.”]

Sloth - the 7th one .. wait for it!!

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JAY 9:02 AM  2 comments

The Man Who Sold His Soul

Illustrations: From Ghost Rider (Johnny Blaze sells his soul to the Devil to cure his Dad's cancer)

Genre: Semi-Fiction (Everything is..)

Ratings: *

Warning: Leave your Sanity behind.

A couple of days back Namita (my mentor from Graphology Classes) thanked me for encouraging her to write as she started to blog again. This is her comeback show - Masala Chai..!!!

I only texted back in whatsapp – Blog brethren missed you :).

I had a wide grin on my face, a thousand times wider than the smiley that punctuated my response on whatsapp. She is part of a larger scheme of things which she will realize when it will be too late for her to dig herself out of the pit. It’s a Devil’s apprentice at work.

About a year back I met this guy who called himself  - The Devil. That very moment I realised life disappoints you in many ways. This devil wasn't how I had imagined it to be like the one I saw in Onida Ads (Neighbour's Envy, Owner's Pride). He was a smooth talking guy in suit who loved to preach. “Talking” he told me was what makes us human. [I was trying to understand him but all I could do that moment was to imagine my Babita Aunt as 20 times the human that I am. If words were actually physical objects no one will have a room to move when Babita Aunt is around. More about her later.] Throughout his lengthy monologue, all The Devil asked me to do was to make people text/blog/write. Everyone should text or write and write so much that they stop talking to each other. To end the eloquent pitch, I agreed to sell my soul to the Devil and make this a non-communicating noiseless world.

For every soul claimed, I was duly awarded – An Alto for a Car, Badminton fellow mates for this sports crazy guy, a won’t-disturb-you-while-you-sleep maid, a nexus 7 to read e-books, a won't-bother-you-after-sex for a girlfriend (too much :P.. ok, ignore the last one). A small man has small needs and even smaller desires (often even in his dreams). I may put it here lightly but once upon a time, I was a nice guy too and crossing the line wasn't easy. Initially, I had to cope up with shame and its first cousin despair. Slowly and steadily, I drowned all the feelings of malice in Scotch. It no longer kills me to take away a bit of humanity from every human’s life.

Despite history teaching us otherwise we dwell in underestimating the power of alcohol. Those who haven't tasted will never understand or agree that fine tasting single malt was all it required to convince Nehru to agree to the partition (True Story!!).

A small man has small needs and it’s the Devil who understands it!!

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JAY 12:48 AM  No comment

I Phone: I and the Game of Phones

Reference - Page 69, A Game of thrones, A song of Ice and Fire - by R.R. Martin

Intro: 
Jay Stark has just taken the responsibilities for the Hand of the King in Westeros; which is like being Deputy to the King. A tired, irritable and hungry Jay has been summoned to attend an urgent meeting of the small council.

Littlefinger = Master of the coin = Finance Minister
Varys = Master of Whisperers = Head of Intelligence

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Jay Stark : I don’t think I should get such a costly device to communicate. This is an extravagance that the realm can ill afford.

Littlefinger : Master of the coin finds the money. The king and the Hand spend it.

Jay Stark : I will not be a party to such an extravagance.

Littlefinger : His grace thinks a royal device is what the Hand of the King should carry. Every embellishment will add to the aura, which will bring respect. Respect and authority is what you need to take the kingdom from a 5.5 growth rate to 9.

Jay Stark : Authority and respect comes from the genuine interest to do good for the Kingdom. No amount of gold, for that matter Apple products can add any luster to the personality of the Hand.

Jay Stark contemplated for a moment in his thoughts - how happy was he with his Samsung Guru when he was in the North. The Gadget was still probably the cheapest gadget in the North but communication was pure and without any guile.His expressionless face stared at Littlefinger for explanations.

Littlefinger : You would anyways need a device to communicate with the King for he rarely comes out of his harem. Apologies but we have already sinned and bought I Phone 5 for you without your permission. Please, accept this welcome Gift.

Jay Stark retorted: Why I phone 5 and not something else, what about I phone 4 or Samsung Galaxy…? I Phone 5 will cost us 20 Gold Coins more.

Littlefinger : Because I Phone 5 is sleeker, thinner and lighter.

Jay Stark : This one doesn't look thin or light.

Littlefinger : That is because we have put it in a cover that will protect the Phone. It is more delicate than a sixteen year old virgin's hymen.

Jay Stark frowned : So, remind me why did we buy this since, it is not thin anymore and I have to open the case and show it to everyone for them to realize I carry an I Phone.

Littlefinger : Our Lord is truly honorable and bereft of the intention to play in the misty maze of the Westeros. Perhaps Lord Varys can explain the technological detail as I am only the master of coin and I follow the orders.

Varys : My Lord! How it amuses me that it’s the matter of only intellect that an eunuch is called into the service for all other body parts are considered useless save his brain.

Varys flashes a cunning smile towards Littlefinger and continues - Coming back to the matter of our immediate attention – I Phone is a product which originated beyond the walls and like the whitewalkers, its life is beyond the body it is confined to."

Littlefinger : Lord Varys! Apologies for interrupting but could you speak in the language of the commons. (Eunuch! That's how I pay my debts - word for word, insult for an insult)

Varys : What I meant was, I Phone brings about a lot of interest particularly in the Ladies of the castle. This is probably an unnecessary information but even the Hound was being gazed upon by the vixens while he was carrying the device to you.

Jay Stark : That could have been of help, while I was still young and had not been to any war. But now that I am old and devoted to my Lady, who would I want to impress?

Jay Stark stared to the sky for a while and smiled at God's Irony. No young or teeny one can afford the I Phone when they need it the most and the one’s who can afford it, have no need for it. He was still shaking his head when he was interrupted by the stealth voice of Lord Varys - A man is never too old to Brandish his liking for any kitten on the block. Even the likes of you can feast on any damsel in the kingdom. But since, you are not interested the only other thing I can talk about is the magnificent environment of I Cloud, I Tunes, I Message it brings.”

Jay Stark : All these that you mentioned begin with "I" and why do I wonder that the "I" represents over indulgence in self. Do you think the Freecities in the realm and beyond, which use the Google products do not have something to Message, to listen to music and space to store?

Lord Varys : My Lord! there is a reason why one man rules over others and that is, they don’t know that everything in the rulers' disposal is only the glossed over version of everything they have. If, they knew the  holy truth they will be peers and no man accepts to be ruled by a peer. For he who was made by the Almighty suffers from Jealousy and resents to be ruled by anyone but the throne. Thus, the Rules of the Game were made and thus the game of phones had begun.

Jay Stark snatched the phone from Little finger in disgust and walked out of the iron door without saying any word. The entire council could see the half bitten apple logo signing from far away even as the Hand slowly disappeared from the vision.

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JAY 12:29 PM  No comment

And then there was a Google Nexus... (A socio-tech review)

Disclaimer - Those who actually believe, I will enlighten them about the features of the device.. The world is infested with better geeks!!

Nexus 7 is awesome, handy and apt - if reading was the purpose you chased before acquiring this 7 inch device. It will easily fit into your back pocket if you are Khali (read an enormous sloth in WWE) . If you are a lady and you love wearing a polka dot sleeveless dress; you would still look lovely when you have that nexus in your hand instead of your clutches. Nexus is a winner.

The comfort that the device provides has affected another ritual. I have stopped carrying the news paper to the washroom and instead the lovemaking in the bathtub is with the 7 incher!!!. (I meant the browsing on the Nexus u pervert!) Actually, water might be detrimental to its health and I trust you won’t do it unless someone asked you to do so in WHO DARES WINS. There are already two affordable dents in my tab so that’s as much I take care of it (I was not doing any drop test for the review - FYI). This brings me to another USP of Nexus, its price point. Google subsidizes the awesome device so that, it can win the bigger war of OS and applications when compared to the Apples and Microsofts of the world. Total Cost = $250 for 32 GB.

That’s about as much I can talk about the tab features, owning a Nexus is actually a lesson in philosophy and human behavior. The latest Jelly Bean OS and the Play Store are just frills.

Nexus is called nexus because it is a nexus between the Gods/Lords and certain techies in this world to spoil the likes of me further. Not that spoiling me is a gargantuan task and on a scale of toughness it will be next to adding 2 + 2 and arriving at 4. Nevertheless, among the Luxury items that I owned after becoming a Punaikar - it is the most revered one. You can read about the other two in my earlier published tomes... A) The Induction Heater and The Joy of Cooking (you can buy it from Flipkart @ 20% off) ; and B) Alto – The car and the social curse (Published in the October addition of Auto - the mag).

While the induction heater helped Jaybert rise from the dungeons in the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs; The car taught me the social relevance of an automotive at another level. “Do you have a car?” is a cruel Question and probably the only Question crueler than that is “Which car do you own?”. The quizmaster is not interested in the correct answer but with that he/she will classify you into the social strata. This is how the modern day varna system works in India. I have essentially adored my car till now. Every scratch is a proud mark presenting the triumphant return from the battlefield of Pune traffic. But the infallible has fallen and I might change the car. 

Nexus on the other hand had an opposite impact on people. I could feel with various reactions which makes me realise that I am transforming from being a not so touchable retard to an uber cool figure. I don’t hate any bit of it.

Bottomline - Don't wait for the India launch just ask one of your buddies to get it from US!

While you go and buy Nexus, I need to get my commission from Google :) 

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JAY 9:56 PM  No comment

Jaybert

Jaybert is from Elbonia. Elbonia is a little known fourth world town in the communist Bengal. Elbonia has been famous only because long back a large cache of arms was dropped in its mainland to fight the mindless rule of Communists. However, all the hopes of a great renaissance died when the mighty people of Elbonia decided to use the rocket launchers to tie their cows.

Jaybert has been working in a city in the heart of the communists, disguised as a supply chain expert. Secretly, he works with the brotherhood to overturn the communists one day.

Just about two years ago, Jaybert had joined as a fresh and young graduate in an organization, and worked hard to expand the Supply Chain Operations. He expanded the operations for entire 2 years. He accumulated some net +ve accolades (summation of all the brickbats and accolades). Today, Jaybert has just executed a plan to reduce the warehouse area and make all the processes lean.

Pointy haired Boss - What next?
Jaybert - Do I go beyond and open more warehouses?

Pointy haired Boss - Please, feel free to do so as long as you don't ask for cash.
Jaybert - No Cash!!... ummm.. do I get a permission to go and try to win one of those reality TV competitions. This will get us cash, keep me busy for a few months and no one has to know.

Pointy haired Boss - What are the odds?
Jaybert - Let's say, If I compete as a transvestite with a big rack, in a show called Dancing Queen, I can at least reach the semis without a fight. The other option is to enroll into Big Boss, where the probablity to win the event is high even if someone lacks talent.
Pointy haired Boss - That's TV jazz and is risky too. I would need money to fix you to win the competition.
Jaybert - What do I do then? I don't have work. Are you gonna fire me?

Pointy haired Boss - Not really. I already got Catbert to fire your other colleagues. Who do I boss around? Besides you are too cute to let go.
Someone poking the "pitchspoon" into Jaybert's sordid posterior, by now, goes unnoticed.
Jaybert - hmm.. What should I do?
Pointy haired Boss - There is one guy eligible to ask questions here and that's not you. Besides I pay you to think.
Jaybert - I can do one thing. There were two warehouses I built last year. I can destroy them now. It will take about 6 months and then, we can rebuild it ,which will take another 6 months. So, we get busy for the entire year.

Pointy haired Boss - great! I like it.
While you do it, keep some reasons ready for justification of your actions.

(Apologies to hard core ADAM SCOTT fans, for the shortcomings in the above piece especially the lingo)

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JAY 2:55 PM  1 comment

BO-MAN: Our Friendly Neighbourhood

Recently, I found this wonderful conversation between two of the most wittiest personalities around. May be this exaggerated appreciation is there, because I am fond of Boman Irani and his acting skills.

Cyrus: That’s also how you met Shiamak Davar

Boman: Shiamak is a wonderful, wonderful guy. He had come to my studio. I was taking pictures of him, trying to entertain him with my jokes to put him at ease because he kept saying he was ugly. He came back the next day and said, R 16;You know Boman, you should be on stage.’ He asked me to audition for a small part in Alyque Padamsee’s play “Roshni”… Alyque initially had rejected my audition. Shiamak insisted that he would not choreograph the show if I was not in it and I did the show, I did one song in it.
Cyrus: No offence to Alyque, the play was…
Boman: Go ahead and offend Alyque. It’s okay.
Cyrus: Yes, the play was really bad. And the only good part about the play was the pimp… you.
Boman: Parsi mothers are always very proud of their children. After the show, my mother asked around, ‘Did you like my son?’ They didn’t know who her son was. So she said, ‘The pimp is my son.’ Someone ask ed her if she wanted a lift, and she said, ‘My son will drop me.’ ‘Who will drop you,’ they asked from the other end of the lobby and she went, ‘My son… the… the pimp will drop me. Don’t bother.’
Cyrus: (laughs)
Boman: You’re making fun of my mom by laughing. But yes, growing up in a Parsi family, I’m used to Parsi moms. Every time the dhobi comes, she would go, ‘Tum idhar tehro. Main kapda nikaal ke aati hoon’ (You wai t here. I will remove the clothes and come).
Cyrus: (laughs)
Boman: You are laughing at my mom again. I’m offended. (mockingly)
Cyrus: Tell me about the classic romance. Your wife used to buy only 100gm of chips from your shop everyday.
Boman: Dumb me, I would not understand why she would buy 100gm everyday when she could buy in bulk. And then, it struck me that maybe…
Cyrus: Her version is that you were the one who gave her 100 gm everyday saying that you were not allowed to give more. But we’ll stick to yours.

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JAY 12:51 AM  No comment

Theory of olives and flying sperms.

In last few days, I have chalked out 200 plans for the coming holidays and erased them. Hence, the frustration of not being able to come out with anything is growing inside me. It is pinching me and the bitterness is flowering.

Iron Maiden concert in Bangalore this month seems already a distant future. Precariously hanging, is also my Goa plan. G-Spot is dancing in the corner of my mind with his offer to go to Vaisno Devi. It is easier to fight US elections, than fix a plan for me. STD accuses me of the laziest and slowest guy to have roamed this earth.. Holy crap!!!! wd u believe it .. he he he.

I am lazy and slow. But O.J. Simpson beats me blue at that. Didn't you hear his latest claim. He says:

"Anna Nicole Smith's child is actually his. The gal child was born late because of his slow moving sperms. He hopes that there is no DNA test, otherwise it would be found that he is the father. He is among the three other men who have thrown their hats in the ring and claim the child is their."

Weird as it may sound, It would certainly do Anna proud if she is looking from the up-above. This is just the second weird findings of the week. The banana split guy, who lives close by introduced me to his cousin. Conversations took us around the world. From Charlie Sheen's hairdo in Hot Shots to Theory of olives from "How I met your mother".

She listens to Tony Flow and the Miraculously Majestic Masters of Mayhem. She says she is a big fan of their music. I said, "gulp!! gulp!! ok". It would have been easier to swallow had she just said she likes Red Hot Chilli Peppers, as the band is known now-a-days.
When she asked me what I listen to, I said, "cacophony of the weirdest lizard on earth which surely isn't miraculously majestic master of mayhem's fluidity." ..ok.. whatever it meant... bleh..

She said are u applying Theory of olives. Aha!! something I had an idea about. Theory of olives states that if you like olives and the counterpart doesn't there is an attraction.So , if some one likes red hot chilli peppers i wouldn't.
I said, "may be, if it impresses you ... however,I hardly have an idea what I am doing, except for attempting a sarcastic take on ur taste in music.. And in which I have failed measurably."

She shrugged her shoulders. I shrugged her mine.

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JAY 9:07 AM  No comment

Search for Comic Relief :Rumble in the THONG

This is last weeks' pursuit of much needed comic relief in various dimensions:

Hog the blog:
Bloggers have been writing their way to glory on some trite and boring subjects(or may be I was reading the saddest of them all).I was getting really despo to read stuffs that can titillate me. Then, I bumped into David Maiki's excellent work of creativity and imagination through a list of 12 most humoruos people on the net. David Maiki's combination of contemporary theme with archaic surroundings is worth having a look at, than reading gossips about Angelina or talking about immaterial-racial-mud-slinging-in-a-reality show (read Big Brother). Anyways, it gave me the pip to rejuvenate my own immature attempt at wearing the thong again through my greenhorns. Making a complete strip requires a lot of effort.. pheww!!(Dude!.. have u seen a GUY struggling in a thong or trying to manage a Saree.. IT indeed is an effort..nvm if u don't get what I said.)

Rumble in the thong:
Now this may not be funny for most of you but it is for me. Like an year ego me and a friend of mine had this bet that Hillary Clinton is gonna run for the HOT SEAT or not. I have been watching her moves with anticipation of a pregnant woman and here she gave in to the itch in her thong. Some of these women have extreme discomfort in their undergarments and u can easily find it out looking at their movements.

Domestic LOL:
People have been suggesting putting in some hot pics which can finally put the ratings of your blog high. (Afterall blogging has been reduced to popularity charts and number of clicks.) I was asked to join CLICKY (web statistics) and it handed me my 1st laughter of the week.

"this dude from US clicked my blog post pornucopia while he was looking for underage literotica in google"

Sick.

So, I looked at more of masala stuff in surroundings to put in my blog and the closest I could come up was this pic :

This guy is my dorm mate and is an ex-Adobe employee. (I can reveal this coz his face has been destroyed to an unrecognizable extent... he he).Thats cake on his face.
No wonder why I run away and they can't find me in my birthdays.

Anyways, we have been doing 007 to find out to whom does the finger belong.. Sucking up to whom.

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JAY 7:52 AM  12 comments