Other Things We do Besides cutting Credit Ratings of the Yanks..

We, as a sect/a herd/a community, don't really care to be on top or be in the limelight and generally take the easy way out. Hence, what Sharmaji from the friendly neighborhood did was surprising. Putting a butt-plug in an otherwise constipated US administration isn't every day what a BIT, MESRA alumnus or a Jharkhandi would do. The day, US was downgraded by S&P, my phone buzzed with a few friends messaging, "Atta Boy! Deven Sharma, the chief at S&P is a Mesra Guy.. and a Jharkhandi". It was a shock and awe treatment to bring us out of oblivion.

Deven Sharma is the 2nd Mesra guy who has been making the noise. There is another Mesra guy called Karan Bajaj who has appeared on the scene. He has written two bestsellers "keep off the grass" and "Johnny Gone Down". The books are pure Masala Matinees - a nerd and a genius is pretty much center of the story. The protagonist is into difficult situations and he comes out triumphant. Yeah! beautiful chicks offer him easy sex. There are references to so many run of the mill popular porn stars we all can relate to. Quintessential MESRA. There are a few skills you learn in Mesra - that no other college teaches.

(This is the only picturesque place in Mesra)

Mesra otherwise keeps it to itself. Never revered the way IITs are the world over. Even the 2nd spot is peacefully taken by NITs. BIT, MESRA - a poor cousin of still vibrant BITS Pilani; has over the years been a story of steady decline. No Indian kid just out of his puberty, dreams of getting into this institution. Nor does it gives orgasmic pleasure to the parents, when their kid is through to the college. Yet, it gives easy and decent paying jobs for knowing nothing.

Like any other college, It also gets its share of sex starved teenagers, some of them geeky nerds but mostly average kids with myriad backgrounds. We had rich kids, poor kids.. smart kids.. non kids, males and a few non-males. We had a lobby known as The Mantri Lobby - dedicated to the sons and grandsons of ministers. Some of them were more mercurial than Appam (Sreesanth) and others, were more sedate than our Sardarji (Mr. Man-Mohan). We never produced too many CAT crackers or CEOs. Actually, I don't know if there are a few champions out there as we don't have a strong alum network. Life after College for a MESRA guy is exactly the way It was in the college... who gives a F to the world.. easy work, easy life, easy death. 

Yesterday, a bunch of us met here in Kolkata.We shared umpteen Mesra Gossips. Manish Sonkar told us his favorite Mesra story -

In the 2nd yr, I had to take a break for 2 months because of an illness. I came back to the college, and it was exam time. I was looking for the notes, I had given to one of my friends. He informed me that it was with a certain Gautam Bhai. One day after Dinner; near the washroom, I saw Gautaumji and asked, "Gautaumji! can you give me the notes." Gautaumji, stared at me and said,"Maine aapko toka kya? fir aapne mujhe kyun toka?" (Did I ever disturb you? Then, y did you disturb me." "Gautamji, I was just asking for my notes, You know exam time.." "Aapne mujhe fir toka" (you poked me again).. Peacefully, I walked away thinking "whokey! .. no notes. lol! but what the fuk is wrong with the guy." Next day there was a buzz in the gossip circles. People were asking me.. why did I take panga with Gautaumji? And I was like ".. wtf, It was just notes, okey! I will write everything afresh. Big Deal.." and Big Deal it was.

Next day, a truck load of Tribals were waiting outside the gate to bash the notorious guy who was irritating Gautamji. Somehow a senior stepped in and advised me not to venture out. As soon as I got a breather, I was back home for another 2 months.. till things cooled off in the campus."

Within 2 years, Manish moved to New Zealand where he completed an integrated course in Engineering. Now, he is something that he describes as a serial entrepreneur and has been associated with a lot of start-ups.

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JAY 11:58 AM  No comment

Pulp! Fiction: Shalom to Slam on

[watching Pulp Fiction would help you connect and puke at the farce which follows.]

Prologue

When I was packing to leave for Kolkata, the smell of Marijuana was yet to dissipate in the hut. A new day of immorality had begun while the ashes from the wrong deeds of last nite hadn't quite settled. I hopped across the ruins with my luggage in the hall. There was Mobydick lying on the floor in a pool of blood. Two immaculate signature skull signs on his face suggested, this was the work of the deadly duo Vincent Tiru Vega and Donnie Danko (Ram).

Prelude to the Battle of Musicals

All the warlords had gathered in that Delhi winter to attend STDs wedding. STD introduced us to a lot of tribes and their warriors. One of them, was his close aide and confidant, Mobydick. Pyaar se they called him Mahalingum. (Legend had Mobydick wielded his "tool" like Lord's weapon to kill giant mosquitoes. Today, folks may not appreciate the selfless work done by Mobydick, but a mythical hero of the 40s India couldn't have been different - Mobydick : the super crusader against Diarrhoea and Malaria).

The guests were treated lavishly with booze and binge at Shalom. The South Delhi lounge bar couldn't quite satisfy the herd and they decided to take the party to the underground bastion of STD. All the wild cats gathered around fire to sing, dance, booze and smoke weed.

The battle of Musicals

Mobydick had repeated for the nth time in his pumpkin intrepid English, "Guys! you don't listen to Pink Floyd!! What is wrong with ya all?." The rum soaked voice went on to ridicule our musical taste. Donnie Danko ignored him for the nth time. As his fingers slipped over the face of his new android HTC and played songs after songs, Mobydick was getting offended more and more.

Vincent Tiru Vega would often dispel the growing tension in the room by playing songs that would melt any hostility. His cheap booty-shaking Bollywood numbers would cut across even the divine differences of "the geeks" and "the freaks", "the chicks" and "the dicks", "the laid" and "yet to be laid". Hence, Vincent Vega received a meek approval from the opponents. If there was a battle of musicals to go into the annals of fable, this was one. Mobydick forcing Eddie Vedder down Medha's ears, Medha Wallace pleading Bhooke to play Eddie Vedder, Bhooke playing Wolfmother for Donnie Danko, Donnie Danko playing Iron Maiden for Vincent Vega and Vincent Vega playing Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast. It was a Mexican Standoff. 

After Eddie Vedder's song was taken to immortality by Mobydick, Medha Wallace realized, the umpteen Mojitos weren't enough to make her go through with that excruciating pain. She quietly moved out of the scene.

When I left the scene, the battlefield had three last men sitting: Donnie HTC Danko, Vincent Blackberry Vega and Moby IPhone Dick. A passing glimpse showed me a glint in Danko's eyes, smile in Vega's face and fear in Mobydicks soul. While, I was shutting the door of my room, I heard Mobydick sing "daughter". After a minute I heard, "thud! thud!". An eerie silence followed.

Epilogue
As soon as the flight landed in Kolkata, Bhooke received a twitter update on his phone, "Vincent Vega and Donnie Danko have struck again - reveals a new youtube video!"  

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JAY 9:50 AM  No comment

Deed as a DODO

Disclaimer: This post is off the track - like the chain reaction of randomness...

There are a few things, I should have learned from others but I didn't e.g. devil may care attitude from Govinda's dressing sense and sex nirvana from Swami Nityanand. These are missed opportunities. Lately, I have decided to be more sensitive and pick up inspiration from the surroundings wherever possible. One such inspiring personality is DODO. Double "DO" doesn't mean he does a lot. Now, why is he called Dodo? - I will leave it your imagination. Dodo - used to be a flightless bird and considered extinct in its feather avatar. It also used to be part of a fascinating term "dead as a dodo", before it was over used by one Mr. I-can't-shut-my-hole Sidhu for cricket commentary. Wiki mentions it as a Biblical name possibly meaning beloved whereas;  answers.com attributes it to someone who is out of date.

Dodo has all the aspirations for a good life and probably has a taste for it too. But, don't make the mistake of him being in the same league as Mr. I-have-got-money-Mallaya. He is a Jabber-walky alright! but not  as much of a loud mouth as the liquor baron. Our Dodo is a mellowed - a more feminine version of the king of good times, a lazier arse - prolly a hippo. Sitting in the back of his car and turning the pages of the newspaper, I realize he has muttered some 3 more cars he wants to own. He already has a car and I have none. While people go on rambling about the cars they see all around - I can barely identify a pony. I was sure, so much of car talk will make me shit little hot wheels next morning. Do you recall a commercial where Kareena smashes your brains with the constant jabber? I think it was an Airtel ad. Well! (if Dodo doesn't mind) - at times he is a chatterbox like her. Having said all that, Dodo is a nice guy and you don't mind the ramble. Once a while you could fuck around with him, "Dodo! Did you think Raveena was hot in that wet yellow saree in Tip Tip Barsa Paani". He looks at me and sayz, "despo!". I say, "lol!".
The other day he mooned over which watch should he buy - Fossil, Swatch and .. so on. The bare wrist of mine smiled at me - while I ignored Dodo's moaning. There are other things which give him orgasm - like the luxury resorts they show in "Travel and Living". I think once or twice I switched on to watch that channel on TV was when I was prolly sleepwalking or was doped to insanity. Most likely, Dodo would have been a more appropriate name for me than anyone else.

If ever I have some money to spend and I have trouble deciding what to do. I would pick Dodo's list of endless things to do b4 you die (read marry). That'll be a no-brainer. But till then, the thing that satisfies me is home cook food and ride back home from office in Dodo's car. For the record - Dodo is a gr8 cook and a sad pilot. 

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JAY 9:41 AM  No comment

Pimpin in Park Street

Every little celebration in Kolkata culminates in Park Street (..the other place would be Tangra, china Town given that your not a rich kid). Park Street also underlines the Liberal Society that Kolkata harbors. Just the other day we were having dinner at Peter Cat when we witnessed two men, sitting besides us, poking at each others' mouth with their tongue. I looked at Naughty Nero and smiled. Naughty Nero said, “Your intense glare is now making me nervous; please, look away.”
Though it’s a bit of an unfair illustration, but not entirely inaccurate. If you call Kolkata the gay capital of India – your dart is not falling far off. Startling scenes (..by Shiv Sena standards) would paint the landscape of Park street. So, you can see free flowing alcohol but hardly any drunken brawls, transvestites hitting the discs at night but hardly being treated as social outcasts and plunging necklines but hardly any stares. (Ummm.. ok the last one is untrue. That would be very unIndian and disrespectful towards women and their right to be stared at.)

Ok... another one before my moral ethos kick in.
If you have landed up in Park Street for food, there is 80 % chance that you will1st try your luck in BarbQ. It serves awesome Tandoori delicacies. That’s what I did following Jay's 1st law of hunger i.e. to find tandoori chicken when hungry. The place was crowded. We were hushed away by the manager with a grin as there was "no room for Bachelors".  As soon as we left dejected, Nature did its balancing act. It had sent a Messiah of bachelors. In laymen's language you can call him THE PIMP. These guys roam around the entire locality like little cock-roaches (lol! what an apt name). A shady character approached us and brushed past us mumbling something like, "kuchh chahiye kya sir". In the moment of confusion, the pimp came closer and said, "Sir! kuchh sewa karoon?". I smiled and said, "What the F!!" “College girl bhi hai!" blurted that slimy old fart. Just before I could nod my head in refusal, Naughty Nero interrupted, "Kitna loge (How much)!!" I distanced myself before any acquaintance could see me getting my hands dirrrty. I waited for Naughty Nero to finish his adventure. He seemed to love every bit of the interaction. He always had said, "He is the only broker who doesn't mind being called a broker." These were the longest 5 minutes of my life. Naughty Nero joined me with a smile of a man who just had his orgasm, leaving the pimp perplexed.
“Why were you unnecessarily bugging that guy?”
Naughty Nero said, "Chill dude! I was just negotiating. That guy was quoting exorbitant rates for the women sitting beside the Metro Station. lol!! Who is gonna shell out hundreds by the hour. I asked him when the fun is only for the 15 - 20 minutes why should I pay for the hour. Docomo ka naam suna hai (Have you heard of Docomo). Brother! ab telecom mein bhi per second billling hai. It seems a classic case of lack of competition." I countered like a sloppy snake woken suddenly. I was surprised and shocked at his argument, which looked stupid at the periphery but really required some thought to beat it hollow.
While I imagined getting calls from unknown numbers pitching for new post paid plan, "Use our girls, pretty ones in all shapes and sizes! Pay a minimum rental and pay by the second"; Naughty Nero signed off by saying, "Boy! Do the new!”

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JAY 1:16 AM  9 comments

Mannu Bhai Motor Chali pom pom.

We had driven hardly for about 15 min., yet it seemed an endlessly painful rock ride. Heavy vehicles would come from the front, flash their lights and we would have a complete blackout. Sitting on the pillion I would wonder how Mannu was able to guide our way into the darkness. Soon, Mannu interrupted my thoughts.

"Can u see anything".
"No"
"Me too'.

I smiled. "Then slow down the bike".

"Ok"

His left feet flicked on the gear peddle and the bike slowed down.

"Arre its too slowwww.." Couldn't complete it. Damn bump dram hump pump. I only had an idea something was going wrong. The front wheel wasn't on the road anymore. Seemed we were sliding down a pit. Suddenly, the body mass of existence flew in air. The laptop that was till now sitting pretty on my back, was suddenly over my head pulling me along.

My palm touched the ground 1st and the cell fone slammed on the flat hard road. (Sehwag's mom had advised to keep the cellphone mutthi mein - not my fault) I wasn't resisting any of these nature's call. I just let it go and with a sommersault I was 6 fts away from the bike. The Laptop was still hanging around though.

Pat - Jay gets up. Pat - he would assess this not the sets of MI2. Pat - Jay thinks he had a friend called Mannu with him.

My wandering eyes fixed on to mannu who was getting up. I started enquiring if everything is alright. He said "Yes, seems so. Look at my face it seems I am hurt around the forehead"

I looked at him, I could see his skull. His forehead had hit a stone and it had split the forehead open with a big cut. I said "nah, its cool. Lets try to get the bike on the road and move on."

Some bystanders helped me to get the bike back on track. I asked them If I could get a medic help somewhere and moved along. They guided us to a nearby engineering College. I enquired Mannu if you wanna go the college hospital and he refused. He was stiched in a small clinic near the college.

They all asked if we were students of the college. I said "oh umm we were, three years back. Now, Mannu teaches there and I have come to meet professors afer a long time".

The whole episode was no less exciting than experiencing . The only regret remained - "the flashlights and cameras around to capture the "somersault" or pretty chicks watching me do the act :(.

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JAY 1:12 AM  1 comment

Smoke on the water

Crap on the water: This post was supposed to be titled "O Jay, Where art thou ? - part II". I realized (not so soon) that before I posted "O Jay, where art thou - part I" (last post), one of the notorious bloggers in the blogspace called Lizze had already posted with a similar title "O Michael, Where art thou". You may argue that replacing Michael with Jay makes it more spicy (puts a face biting its tongue) but it will also make me charter in troubled waters. This woman (supposedly) is becoming an American from a Londoner(prolly) and thus, the chance of her suing me for copyright violation has increased. I may do a Kaavya Vishwanathan and argue that I prolly derived the name subconsciously from a movie which goes by the name "O Brother, where art thou"; but trust me, it doesn't help. They all believe what they wanna believe (puts a sad face).

(please, increase the volume)

Smoke on the water: This wasn't supposed to be the arbitrary display that u just read in the prologue.(Lizze may just kill me for all that). It was supposed to be classical, non funny and tasteless essay.
The March heat was on. While all the students had gone back home or were holidaying, there were two guys, Lota ji and Nirmal babu still entrapped within the red walls of the college making charts, cracking data and calling important people to make the ends meet. These no non-sense guys were agribusiness management students and had declined big bucks for entrepreneurship. They were working on several projects simultaneously. This all had started when The Chief Minister of Bihar (a state), Mr. Nitish Kumar visited the campus last year. Several students presented projects to uplift the state and were willing to work there. The Minister gave a go ahead. They made a support group comprising the students. Each student would pursue his own project while the support group would provide consultancy and take a hit if one of the students fails in his venture. The ideas ranged from Rural Radio, Retail chain, Insurance plan for Rickshaw pullers, Extracting Ethanol from corn to various consultancy projects for the government. A lot of them are already on its way. Some of the national news channels splashed a one hour documentary on it. The word spread. Venture capitalists, Consultants and supporters from various parts of the country, USA and Europe started calling these people. Now, Nirmal babu says proudly "we won't need Bank Loans. Money is not a constraint. Not for me, not for you and not for any frog who wants to jump out of the well".
Energy rubs on me and I kept wondering, for the past two years where was I and what was I doing "O Jay, Where art thou".
Down South Goa. under a full moon and a clean sky, Jay was sipping wine on the beach along with his friends Medha, Danko, KG, Tiru and Jhade Singh. Jay was singing raunchy Bhojpuri songs one after the other and people were egging him on.
Medha: "abe! gaana aur suna na" (sing me a song) Jhade Sigh: " Do u remember e guddi".
Jay: " O yea, E Guddi.. arre ye Guddi!! aaa Khele chorwa sipaiyya"
"Banhiya mein dhar ke raja....(censored.)"

Jhade Singh was dancing and singing alongwith me. Jhade Singh completed his graduation last year and he himself had declined a good job offer to open "chain of spa and wellness centre" with Hukka. Last year, there were about 6 people who had decided to go on their own, this year there are 11. This year, there are several portals made by some of the students which have become huge hits. Among them "CRICSTOCK" (mixture of Cricket and stocks trading) and "10 a day" (a portal for CAT preparation)". Rights of publishing some material on cricstock was sold within months to a national news channel (NDTV.com). The deal ranged in Lakhs. Does it sound like the youtube story? My own baddie partner Paro had a plan in place for "becoming a supplier of a women's inner wear brand" (wipe off that smile), which will cater to somewhere between the high end and low end customer. Her pic was splashed in the cover page of national magazine. Imagine what kind of peer pressure it exerts on other people. Another friend dearly called Hilao, declined a Lehman Brother's offer because he wanted to indulge in real estate.
All these things don't demoralize me but make me proud. After all when a college is branded Harvard of India or the Best B-school in Asia-Pac, it has to shoulder responsibilities and produce entrepreneurs. So what, if people like Jay chose easy way out by working for some one else .

Well wait... Jay has a plan in place too . U may just hear what he is planing to do soon. So, wait and meanwhile stop wondering, y does the post has a title smoke on the water. Its cryptic.. he he he.

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JAY 1:10 PM  4 comments

O Jay. Where art thou ?

"..been drinkin, sinkin and thinkin in Goa..got tanned like coal.. biked.......beer red wine white wine sea food sleeping on the rubber floater tattoo masti cards.. sand ....ab rehne de jay!!!"

This post was long due. The Goa trip had gobbled me into such laziness that I wd sit back like a sloth whole day in my room doin nothing but watching Prison Break and Rome.

Goa was an awesome trip. Danko and me left from Ahmedabad, Pankhi and Jhade Singh joined us in the trip...while, KayG and Tiru had already booked cottages for us in Palolem Beach. Palolem is among the top 10 beaches in the world. It features in the movie bourne supremacy. Palolem is 80 km down south from the other popular beaches near Panjim and hence the domestic crowd rarely indulges in the adventure. Thus, it remains one of the less crowded beaches and plenty of foreign tourist spend months in there. The Beach is really cool coz u walk two steps into the sea and u will have enough water to swim and there aren't forcefull currents that will take you away.

We hired bikes from Panjim city for 5 days. And hell!!!! I had been missing biking. I do love Pulsar DTS I. Its been two years since I quit my job, when I had biked to my satisfaction. Pulsar is the only bike that matches faintly the joyride of Yamaha RX 100.. By the time we hired it .. it was already evening .. and I had no idea that the road to Palolem is through the hills. The next 5 hrs was spent worrying about the twists and turns and dark jungles .. the journey threw upon me (occasionally), the cool breeze and a speed of 100 km/hr .. did give me some relief....

Unlike my other posts, this one sounds like a mundane travelogue. But, I can't muster enough energy to write the way I do.................. So, I will simply put some pics out here from the Goa trip and this anecdote :

The departure flight for Ahmedabad was to leave within an hour. I was waiting in the cab while Jhade had gone to pick other frnds and luggage. Suddenly the driver turns back and asks "So, did u enjoy Goa trip".. I said I did. He continued "been to Arambol beach. akkha nude beach saab. Udhar kya hai na.. usko dekho koi fikar naye... but dont stare for too long.. Side se dekhne ka ..and move on.. total firungs.(white ppl).. "

me: "Nah, didnt go there. Been to Palolem .. its similar and lotsa Israelis. And also to Agonda thats more secluded than others. udhar kya hai na RAVE PARTY bhi attend kiya, Every firung was dressed in white gown. Mast.. booze, grass and blah.."

My eye brows wd go up and down in coherence with the spicy details wherever it was required. The interest of the cab driver was providing me enough incentive to go on.

Cabbie: " umm Goa is like that. Poora Masti karne ka. Idhar Firung ko lagaya kya?" his voice dipped suddenly and he watched my facial expressions very keenly as if there hinges the mystery of all wisdom.

Me: " Nopes. nahin Lagaya" pause. "Arre tumne to lagaya hi hoga itne saal se reh rahe ho" (arre u must have screwed some white chicks, u have been living here for so long.

Cabbie: "haan Boss. Once.."
By that time pankhi, danko and Jhade had returned with all the luggage.

The cabbie opened the doors to help them but for a second he turned his head, smiled at me and sneaked in a few words: "Firung ko lagane ka alag maza hai. Agli baar aao aap." ( its a different experience experience with white females, u come next time ..;)

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JAY 5:16 AM  7 comments

Sea, Sand, Sun and Skin

(Disclaimer: characters and incidents in the following act is purely incidental. Any resemblance to the movie 300 is purely incidental).

These were the few brave men who had defied destiny. They fought against slavery. They fought like there was no tomorrow.They were led by their will to enjoy the fate, they had come here to embrace.

They looked at the sun which was being gobbled by darkness. The breeze was from the west .... prolly originated in the angst of Persia. Even the sea was hitting the shores with passion and vigour. Apocalypse now. However, only thing etched in the minds of these few men up against all odds, was FREEDOM.

The King, looked at the murky sky and remembered the red walls, which had imprisoned him and almost decapitated him for two years. Then, he turned to face the fellow soldiers, who had vowed to die with him and cried with LORD'S own stereo:

"SPARTANS !!!!!! tonite.........we die in our undies"

Soon..... the warriors JAY, HAT, FUGGA, CANTO, MAXI, BOCHO, FOOZIE and Junglee NATO threw their naked bodies, wrapped only in underwears; to the sea and swam and dived and somersaulted and played and laughed and sun burnt themselves till FUGGA said, "mujhe bhookh lagi hai" (I am hungry).

We were holidaying in DIU. DIU is a small island and used to be a Portuguese colony. It has got beaches, the Portuguese church, some good Italian restaurants, sea food, booze and peace. There are too many stories from the trip. I wish I could dish them all here. People rush to this place mostly because there is a ban on liquor in my state and nearby Diu is a good excuse to let the juices flow. I was surprised to get discounts in the resort we lived in for two days. I was amused by the fact that the Identity card of my college was doing wonders 100s of kilometers away. I was with a bunch of friends who had let the peer pressure and finance jobs bypass them and accepted marketing jobs (which was only 8% of the final job scene this year in my college).



I would put anecdotes from the trip sometime later. Right now I am bugged by my itinerary. I have finally booked tickets for GOA (the poor man's CANNES). Tiru and KayGX would join, me and Danko there in GOA after attending the IRON MAIDEN CONCERT. (oh man! y did I miss it.) Maxi is joining NOKIA which has sponsored the IRON MAIDEN CONCERT and is also Sponsoring SHAKIRA's SHOW in Mumbai. Our own Tadka is looking after the two concerts as a representative of NOKIA. Tickets/ Passes wd have been available so easily :(((((. Anyways, as of now ... following schematic diagram is supposed to represent "how jay, broke sackles, toured, laid eggs, punished cockroaches and got a life" for next 20 days.

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JAY 4:59 PM  4 comments

The Dawg is leaving

There are numerous videoz made every year. This one is one of the videoz, which captures and arouses my sentiments for leaving one of the best places on earth after 2 years. The video has been made by Proxy, who is now joining a Swiss Bank and its all about the Dormies. All the Dawgs captured in the video. ...................................................................I need a shoulder to cry now!!!!

There is this video from one of "the wannabe rival college of ours". The video is sweet and for our batch, thus, it reciprocates our feelings. It is extremely nostalgic :( and the composition is their own.

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JAY 1:21 PM  2 comments

Need to write..

The evilllllllllllllllllllllllllll has been let loose.

I just finished the last exam in my life. TOmorrrow, I will start packing to go back home after 2 loooooooooong yrs, in which was prostituted by the books. (Doesn't feel bad tho .. I was a high end call boy of the acads ).

By the looks of it, u should feel by now I am going crazy. Batasha was the 1st one I called in the moment of ecstasy. Then, I wanted to call others.....hell!!! some inhibitions stopped me from doing so. Anyways, so here I am; my heads swinging to the Voodoo child by Jimi Hendrix and my fingers moving fast over the laptop surface.

Tomorrow, The sexy-eyes-Doc is coming to the town for an Interview. He is my long time undergrad friend and is also known as the man of weird ideas in the Jay world. When we finished XII, we took admission into St. Xavier's college (not telling you which Xaviers .. na na na). So, the class had like 40 gals and 10 guys of which 3 wd remain absent. When we would sit in the Lab.. staring at the gals... Doc wd mention "Jay!!! when r they gonna make prostitution legal in the country. When wd my dream of opening a brothel be realized.Oh!! Amsterdam I miss u".
After a brief stint there in the college he followed me to the undergraduation (B. Tech.) and we had fun.......... the story thereafter is LEEE GEEEN wait a minute its coming DDDARY.

But, I will talk about all those later.. right now two stingy chopsticks .. a few sexy white grain of rice and an aphrodisiac called Water is waiting for me ........ I NEED TO EAT.

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JAY 2:51 AM  4 comments

The Newbies

Some fresh new wonderful people have joined the blogspace.Anny joined a few days back. Now her counterpart and arch rival Iqra.

This is the hymn for Iqra.She is little wonder gal from Pakistan. Her energy rubs on to me whenever she talks. When I 1st saw her, I felt that she has been sent with only one motto in life " Some people were born to rule, some were born to demolish the twin towers,Tiger woods was born to put the balls into the holes .. but Iqra was born to TALK"..

Iqra is sweet and its nice to see her in blogspace now.Exactly an year ago I had met a similar gal, with such energy and vibes(the world certainly revolves). Though everything with her ends with Roger Federer,which is not exactly the cake I love .. but hell, This gal is nice.

Welcome to Blogger. In her words " u ko bhi likhna chaloo karna chahiye".

Allah hafiz

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JAY 4:23 PM  11 comments

My own group thing.. ;)

On Tuesday, we had a dinner .. thrown up by Navin aka Tuppe. It was more of a get together of our 1st year study group.

1st year was hectic down here. Thankfully I was partnered with a bunch of very down to earth people. We were a crazy bunch and we stuck together for all the three terms in the 1st year, though . other groups were disintegrating.So here is the crazy bunch we had fun with on Tuesday..

Srini(aka tHorny): returned to India after six yrs in US cause he felt home is calling. Too bad he is having a brush with reality now.Got back to study ...is on a sabbatical ( His employers r taking him for granted .. hua hau hua). A techie...
latest issue : marriage and has just found He is a Manglik.
(omfg... That means he can marry only a Manglik girl and they are rare :| )

Oh! I didnt add the nicest guy i have met.

Navin (aka Tuppe): Thyself is double the volume I am. After leaving IIT KGP .. only thing he misses is his Boozing capability.
latest issue: 1st year was betta, atleast the academics kept him busy. Now he is too bored with nothing much to do ..

Sirji, made us cover another 6-7 km for a sizzling brownie he likes .. after we had our dinner.

Ami (aka Mimi aka Psycho): The 1st thing i asked on the dinner table is "u got engaged? (look at the pic .. it seems so)" .. She ain't but soon she would. She is a "nice gal". One should have seen her bursting the ass of one of head honchos in front of the whole class.. where does she store so much anger!!
Latest Issue: Problems of plenty.. Levers have already offered her a job .. Hubby is by her side .. things r too peaceful ...:-?

The Missing Gems

Vyom (aka Rancho) : he is cooling his heels in Germany as an exchange student(That guy is obsessed with Germany he went to Germany when he was in IIT Kanpur.. now here too .. y the heck.)
latest Issue : which part of Europe he didnt roam around. "damn gotta go back to college now:(("

He has been a prodigy .. million dollar brain... envy envy envyyyyy.

Jay (aka Bhookey) : forget him.

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JAY 12:38 PM  10 comments

Tennis_balla_shot_calla and blogging

Business communication classes has been strange.We have to put a poster on the walls, where someone else would comment on it. Everyday, I am hit on with some nasty realty.

On last wed. I had a business presentation. The topic could have been any random topic.I was to be marked on my presentation skills and how can I improve my skills.

I slept till 5 am in the morning and I had like 3 hrs left to think of an idea and prepare practice dress and go to get the screw.

Lol and i ended up in the tennis room discussing .. "how croatians make the best gay"(random don't even think bout it.. bad for health). but yeah meanwhile I struck upon the idea of making a business presentation on blogging.
and i did.... i wanted to put my blog in a slide as demo... however, it was this time that it had to happen (Murphy's law: if something can go wrong it will).... DoT Tricks were at it again .. Blogger blocked.

Thankfully, I was talking to one of the meanest assholes in the world... John otherwise known as tennis_balla_shot_calla.
"

John (02/08/2006 6:42:57 AM): you don't know how to tie a tie?
John (02/08/2006 6:43:09 AM): it's over under loop and swoop or something like that
John (02/08/2006 6:43:18 AM): surely you can look it up on the internet
Jay (02/08/2006 6:43:38 AM): well good idea
Jay (02/08/2006 6:43:44 AM): but wanna prepare my own
John (02/08/2006 6:44:19 AM): noo I think you are misinterpreting what I'm asking
John (02/08/2006 6:44:32 AM): what do you mean when you said find a guy that will tie my knot?
John (02/08/2006 6:44:46 AM): or I'm misinterpreting what you're saying
Jay (02/08/2006 6:45:08 AM): i have to go in formals today
Jay (02/08/2006 6:45:21 AM): someone i need to tie the knot of my tie
Jay (02/08/2006 6:45:38 AM): its so embarrassing i cant do one properly myself till today
John (02/08/2006 6:46:31 AM): ok so I did understand you. so why can't you look it up on the internet. There's got to be some idiot that put it out there somewhere because of helpless people like yourself
Jay (02/08/2006 6:47:33 AM):
Jay (02/08/2006 6:47:36 AM): idiot
Jay (02/08/2006 6:47:49 AM): It comes wth practice
John (02/08/2006 6:48:05 AM): I mean smart guy because there's a lot of people that don't know how too. I didn't learn till I was out of college
John (02/08/2006 6:48:19 AM): and since you're technically still in college I guess you're ok. Even though you are 56
Jay (02/08/2006 6:52:53 AM): come on
Jay (02/08/2006 6:52:58 AM): make osme slides for me
Jay (02/08/2006 6:53:02 AM): some*
Jay (02/08/2006 6:53:13 AM): ii am making a ppt on Blogs
John (02/08/2006 6:53:44 AM): http://www.tie-a-tie.net/windsor.html
Jay (02/08/2006 6:53:58 AM): oh 1st lemme prpare the ppt
John (02/08/2006 6:54:06 AM): http://www.scoutdb.org/h2tat/
John (02/08/2006 6:54:43 AM): I think the 2nd one might be better just remember if you're looking at the picture it's going to be opposite
Jay (02/08/2006 6:59:12 AM): make a few god damn slides John
John (02/08/2006 7:00:11 AM): of what? I don't know what your presentation is on or am I supposed to have a presentation on how to tie a tie. I gave you 2 perfectly good websites
Jay (02/08/2006 7:00:26 AM): bad boy
Jay (02/08/2006 7:00:33 AM): i am making a ppt on blogs
Jay (02/08/2006 7:00:41 AM): i have 45 minutes more
John (02/08/2006 7:03:47 AM): does al gore's myspace count as a blog anyways I'm sorry I don't know how to help you as I'm blog ignorant becuase I don't do that stuff
Jay (02/08/2006 7:29:56 AM): hey thats ok , i need 10 more minutes to finish this off
John (02/08/2006 8:12:16 AM): grr how do I do a screenshot again?
Jay (02/08/2006 8:12:29 AM): fuk click the print acreen
John (02/08/2006 8:13:27 AM): fuk where the hell is that?
Jay (02/08/2006 8:15:06 AM):
Jay (02/08/2006 8:15:17 AM): near the insert button
Jay (02/08/2006 8:18:21 AM): grr i am putting someone else's blog
John (02/08/2006 8:19:23 AM): I messed it up anyways I believe
John (02/08/2006 8:19:45 AM): for some reason it's showing my desktop on the side of the page
Jay (02/08/2006 8:20:17 AM):
Jay (02/08/2006 8:20:20 AM):
John (02/08/2006 8:20:31 AM): ok here let me try it real quick again
John (02/08/2006 8:21:12 AM): see if this is any better hurry up and accept this invitation though
John (02/08/2006 8:22:10 AM): hmm nope just cut off some of it fuck if I know what the deal is I only had your website showing
John (02/08/2006 8:25:19 AM): ah ha I got it if you're still there
Jay (02/08/2006 8:26:19 AM): thanx

So, i inserted the screenshot into the presentation and ran to the class.

Only later did i realize that .. what is the setting .. for such a presentation. I cooked up something like this:

Setting: I am part of the HR team in a software organization which wants to bring in corporate blogging in its cyberculture and in future is looking to horizontally integrate into e-business.

Presentation: basics, types of blogs, key factors and issues, basic structure of blog , and a business model/corporate blogging.

Various Comments: Clever idea.
One should not have his tie poking out from the coat, below.
Good answer on privacy issue.
Prolly if u stand upright it will help.

thanx tennis balla.

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JAY 1:23 AM  5 comments